A Lesson from Kanye West - Becoming your own Rock

So, as you may have read from previous posts, my current living arrangements are rather up and down.

For three weeks, I live alone. Sometimes, this can be great. Cue whatever I want to watch on Netflix, minimal washing to be done and well, tidying up after myself can always wait until tomorrow!

Then of course, are the downsides.

My rock features red hair and a grizzly beard

I'd always despised the thought of having to be emotionally reliant on someone. Not only did the prospect seem to indicate weakness (born of the wrong side of feminism), it also carried along with it the guilt of burdening someone you care about with your problems.

Yet, here I am, pretty openly admitting that on occasions (numerous), I do rely on someone to get me through life's more challenging circumstances. And I can say all my previous assumptions on the matter are well and truly trumped. Learning to let someone in has really helped me, and my partner, grow as a couple and as individual. Cheese fest, sorry guys.

So, the only issue now is, when he's not here, knowing how to cope can be difficult. It seems rather juvenile to say, but I guess I never realised how important it was to have someone to waffle to when you get home. All your petty grievances and stresses of the day can be rattled off to a loving ear, and you can get on with your life.

When this outlet is gone, you have to learn to live with yourself. And letting go or rationalising your issues when you're on your own isn't the easiest thing to do. Of course, I lean on my lovely family and close friends, too. But the physical presence of another is what seems to make the biggest difference for me.

I know when things are becoming bad, because I start to dread the smallest things. Things I know I am more than capable of handling. In the absence self-confidence (a lifelong affliction) I've learnt I need to tell myself I'm still the same person in anyone's company. My significant other doesn't give me anything I don't already have - they just make it more apparent.

It's difficult sometimes, because convincing yourself about yourself is hard. People are often their own greatest critics, a category I unsurprisingly fall into.

But I am working on becoming my own rock. Perhaps even one day, I can be my own Kanye-rock.

Tumblr: Kanye on Kanye

Or perhaps not.

What helps you get through tough times on your own? I'd love to hear what makes you your own rock. Share in the comments below